More specifically I guess what really happens is that the hyperthyroidism disrupts my ability to focus, thoughts coming rapid fire and jumbled rather than orderly and sequential. At times I have even found it difficult to speak because I just can't put a sentence together. (Case in point, this is the first blog post since July.) New ideas felt like things I could only see in my peripheral vision.
But then, during that half awake, half asleep time last Saturday morning I realized...I was imagining, thinking through a new earring shape, putting ideas together in my head. It was amazingly comforting. Imagining feels good to me, I guess its just part of who I am, and without it I felt disjointed and as an artist, handicapped in a way.
Recovery is a slow uphill march. I have good days and really not good days. I might not reach remission and even if I do I very well may relapse. But I'm happy for every "normal" moment and I've made peace with the fact that after all the treatment I might have to have thyroid ablation anyway.
Thank you to everyone who has commented on posts and sent me emails - I'm sorry if I wasn't able to answer you directly! I really appreciate the kindness and encouragement!
And I'm happy to be posting new work this week. Four pairs of Convertible, mix and match earrings will be in the Etsy shop tomorrow by noon.